Saturday, March 27, 2010

generosity

Time seems to be flying. Since my last post, Tim turned 35, my mom had two cancer treatments, and Tim and I have both worked tons as well as having lots of fun times with the kids, mostly at home lately. Then there has also been lots of the topic of this month's challenge...no comment there.

I am not sure what I want to blog/share. I am not sleepy for the first night in weeks, which is a direct result of nothing changing besides that I started my thyroid medicine again today. I swear that I can feel a difference today. I seriously feel totally different. craziness.

I finally broke down and bought toothpaste yesterday. We have been making do with and using up every last drop of toothpaste and other products in this house since we started our examined life challenge in November. I have bought dw and laundry detergent, but no other products. We finally couldn't take the toothpaste deficit any longer. The little sample packets of all different types of Crest that came in the mail at some point were my favorite. The sample size Burt's Bees orange creme was my absolute least favorite, which is actually what drove me to buy some. The tiny bottles of shampoo and conditioner and body wash are slowly but surely dwindling down. We are out of dish soap now, but I decided to just mix water with the Dr. Bronner's we have, and use that for dishes for a while. It's fun to make do and stretch our money...and ourselves sometimes in the process!

Yesterday, Isaac and Kendall and I bought plastic eggs and candy for their mother's morning out program Easter egg hunt. Isaac asked what we would put in the eggs when we bought them, and I listed candy, prizes or money as ideas. He insisted on candy, but then later thought maybe coins with the candy would be good. As soon as we got home, Isaac got his wallet out of his room, requested the eggs and candy, and sat down in the living room. "You don't have to use your money," I said. "I want to," Isaac exclaimed as he looked at me longingly. "That's what I want to do with my money, mommy. Giving money away is what you're supposed to do with it. That's why I have so much already (about 15 coins), I bet. Maybe I'll find one of these eggs and get some of it back anyway." What a wonderful interaction with my four year old. It amazes me that he sees and hears and processes SO much...everything down to Tim's and my very soul, it seems. I love that boy beyond all comprehension.

On a similar note, I was talking to someone a couple of Wednesday nights ago about my mom starting treatment the next morning for her lymphoma. That next Sunday...a card from the couple saying to "hang in there"...with $65 enclosed. I had mentioned my mom's financial burdens in having to endure the health stuff without insurance. wow...I was so shocked and amazed. This money felt like such an incredible gift...of money, or care and concern, of validation...i don't know...hard to explain. I desire to be this sort of generous. I want to hear needs and give, if even just $15, from my heart, immediately, with whatever I have or whatever I can do at the time. I dream of being in a financial position to give lots.

Thank you to Isaac and the S's for letting me see the gift of generosity this week. I want to be like you both.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

doing without

...like this title/topic...obviously not related to this month's challenge. LOL!

I put on a boring set of scrubs (1/4 tops and 1/3 pants) this morning as I was getting ready for work, and got the thought that I really needed to buy a couple more scrub tops. Pulling on my socks as I was about to leave, I realized the uncomfortable feeling was my big toe sticking out the top of my sock. "My only pair of brown socks," I thought. A mental note was made that I need socks. By this afternoon, my desire to eat dinner out had grown into a full blown need because we have no food in the house.

I will not get either of those things in the near future, and we had an amazing dinner at home. Doing without, not consuming, living simply, being content...this is the way we are paying off our credit card debt this year (in addition to about $4000 from my accident settlement). I started this year thinking paying off THAT much debt was totally impossible, but with Tim's great passion and determination and both of our desire to do without for the greater good of our family, I think we will actually do it! Tim is blogging daily about our journey to cc debt freedom. A couple of years ago, we had an income about half the size of our outgoing needs. It was a hard, hard time. We did without and life was ok, but I eventually realized how hard it was to have $40/week for groceries and to really have to do without anything absolutely unnecessary. Doing without because you have cc debt you want to pay or something fun you want to do with your money can be very exhilarating and fun. I am so grateful to be in this place now.

Also, you know, both my mom being sick and really paying attention to her financial needs and the needs around me in the world has helped me to *really* consider what is important. Even if we did not have to use it, money to help with her needs, whatever they may be, especially medically, seems SO very much more important than clothes and shoes or paying more for food at a restaurant or for something for this house. We have SUCH high standards in this society. It's hard to keep up to them, even. Basic needs being met is such a low standard...the house needs to be decorated, the clothes need to be everything you ever wanted for your particular body, the accessories are a necessity, eating out is a total given. My thoughts on this are just too long to list.

I just feel like begging and pleading with the world to open our eyes to the poor, to the sick, to the many needs around us. Try hard to do without and pay off debt so you have the freedom to give it and use it for important things like human connection and building up your relationships and loving and supporting others.

In our entire house today, besides the baking supplies and condiments and such, we had oranges, 3 pieces of bread, small amt of applesauce, eggs, milk, garlic, frozen beef (we bought a 1/4 of a grassfed cow last year!), 3 cans of salmon, a can of soup, polenta, rice cakes, ww pasta, annie's mac and cheese, boxed mashed potatoes, barley, popcorn, hummus, homemade banana bread, some thawed cocktail shrimp, leftover spaghetti, and leftover broccoli. Tim and I both thought the food choices were pretty depressing at first glance. Instead, we decided to get excited about making it all work and changing our thoughts. We had...cinnamon toast, banana bread, applesauce, and oranges in the first part of the day, and popcorn, leftover spaghetti, rice cakes with hummus, and shrimp sauteed with garlic and butter tossed with ww pasta with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. It was delicious!

We can thaw some beef and have that and broccoli and mashed potatoes for dinner and mac and cheese and oranges for lunch, and bake some muffins for breakfast with milk for tomorrow. Yes, I obviously need to go to the grocery store, but I am not depriving my family of nutrition and it is great practice to see what I can do with what I have and what we can do without. I bet I can even wear the same clothes over and over to work and still be happy. I sure hope so.

Friday, March 5, 2010

blessed

I thought about putting funny titles on this month's posts irrelevant to content and scaring everyone! lol! Update on this month is that we're on track. I will not say how it's going because every word I could use sounds weird and not enough to describe, but then noone needs a longer description obviously.

It's an eventful weekend, and I am so blessed. My mom went to the hospital tonight, but was able to get what she needed (blood...hemoglobin dangerously low) and get back home before too late. We are blessed to have a third little addition to our family for the night and morning/day. Tomorrow, a good friend of mine from work and her best friend are coming over to hang out. Usually, when someone (or two) is coming over for the first time, one is compelled to clean and present yourself in the best way, but you know what? Especially with my mom being sick, I am learning more and more and more to not even give those sorts of ideas a second thought. Relationships are so very important and such an amazing part of life...and how clean the house is has nothing to do with anything important. So, I will spend my morning with the three precious kiddos and Tim and let them play and make whatever mess they want, and then welcome my friends with open arms. Tim and Isaac are going to IKEA to eat lunch tomorrow and then to the They Might Be Giants kids' concert tomorrow afternoon. Isaac told of this adventure at least ten times today and could not be more excited. I am overjoyed for them. Tim is an amazing dad and husband. Sunday, we will spend the day after church getting together packages from Tim's ebay store. The auctions end on Saturday, and the store is over halfway to Tim's goal. Go bids go!

We settled on my car accident and will be able to see some of our cc debt go away because of it. And...you want to know something super amazing? Someone I have never met gave me $200 to help with my mom's medical bills. My good friend put my mom on her church's prayer list and was praying about her situation one night with some other women. After the prayer, her friend wrote a check to give to me for $200. My friend called to tell me about it while i was in the hospital with my mom last week. It took everything I had to wait to cry until later. amazing. The Emory appointment on Monday is costing us $500, and Tim and I had only been able to figure out a portion. This is an amazing blessing, and my heart is still full because of it.

Whew! Little Moon is finally back to her bed. Time may be short, so I must go. ;)

Monday, March 1, 2010

The Romantic Life

So...although I know a couple of my friends disagree with posting on this topic, Tim and I both feel comfortable sharing this month's challenge, which is to have sex everyday this month. Posting throughout the month will be about whatever is on my mind, as I will certainly not be sharing much else about the month's challenge. I titled the month using "romantic" for fun because surely it will be hard to keep up the romance all month. Here's hoping neither of us get sick or something that would prove to *really* be challenging. Romance and intimacy are both things that Tim and I value greatly and are commited to keeping great with two small kids and jobs and ten years of marriage.

This idea on my year long brainstorm always makes the listener laugh...or sorry they asked...lol...but although initially a little funny, it's nothing I want to hide about or never speak of. I think it's a super respectable challenge. All of that said, I am hoping and praying that noone asks me in a large group or in front of my single friends. oh...and watch my family suddenly begin to follow the blog. Wish me luck! :)