We spent the day with Tim's family celebrating Christmas and cooking and eating a big dinner. Tim's brother had been sick on Thanksgiving and was out of town for Christmas week, so today was a great day to cook our meal together, eat it all up, and open Christmas presents. After everyone left, Tim suggested we take down the Christmas tree. Funny idea since it was sitting in the place where the television formerly lived. I was so happy to see the Christmas bins going into the attic and the simpleness that seemed to magically appear in the house again. I can not say that I am happy to be looking at the big machine with several other little machines all around it that look out into the living room now.
Well...Happy New Year! I am actually not feeling happy at all right now, but I really want to take control of that and just chose to be happy. You would think my Christmas money would make me very happy, but it actually has made me feel overwhelmed and a little sad today. I need clothes. I want the broken blinds in the house replaced. I was planning to get a really nice french press, but Tim expressed he would not be interested in using it over the plastic drip pot (lol...it doesn't have many qualities that make me happy besides the coffee producing ability), and he usually makes the coffee, so I don't think I want one now. I want the big dent out of the front of my new van. I want shoes, but have pairs that will do. I would love a new piece of pottery. I could spend a night in a hotel with Tim, which I love to do. I want to get family passes to Stone Mountain with it. I want to just forget it all and put it towards debt. And then...that leads to...oh you don't want to know...but there are people who need it badly. Then I ask myself why I can not be content with the clothes I have, etc. Truly there is something wrong with me. This is why I will have this Christmas money in May when my birthday rolls around. By then, I will have a little more and feel able to spend a little of what I have now. It'll get spent eventually...it certainly will. One of these days I am going to shock everyone and actually not spend it. At the end of this month, I am going to be truly amazed that I did not eat out at all. I can't wait for the victory!